Patient Chaos

An evolved state of clarity,
Intertwines inside my mind.
I always forget to be patient.
Days, nights...
Come and go,
Bicycles in the sweat of my energy seeping from my pours.
Sitting still calm in hell waiting for a frozen towel to comfort and sooth me to mindlessness.
A shell of an antique time sits heavy like fog- in the walls of entrapment.
The ride is illusive appreciative and resentful. It taunts my heavy face amongst a tidal wave of fury for the one who chose this.
Guided by none other than the lives I peer at through the peephole of my soul. Restrained by monster chains of responsibility. Searching for the event horizon of the rabbit hole Alice so luckily encountered.
A permanent solution to the fiery existence of communication. A crowd of people I want to drown in and submerge my mind and actions of love, god, regression, debt, solitude, growth, life, death, family, and friends.
A lazily kept inside outside shell of wood and paint has kept and confined terrible souls of which I am only one. I dare ye enter during a time when she has drearily vomited diarrhea from her mouth and nose while her eyes spew an amount of blood only a vampire knows. It is not safe here, but I am with you.
The day following one of explosions for gratifications sake is the day in which a false pretense of what living requires- hangs on gently to a thread of hope for tomorrow.
A day that hell hath no fury on the sweat that pours down the face of the ignorant.
A day the mind has found freedom in becoming it's own intricate cell structure or magnificent galaxy.
A day that a day can't know how to live like the free fall of a thirty foot jump, smashing into the water like a two second brick wall just after the few moments of eternity experienced in millimeters before the crash. The sudden give of the water to envelope every cell and bit of mass that has surrendered to it sinking at a hideous rate, no air. A sudden thrust for life and realization of oneself existence jolts every particle that has survived to the top where the fetus bursts through and takes it's first breath. A cry of joy echoes as long as the water flows.
Soothing is the magnetic weightlessness of a smoky bind to dimensions unseen and the fabric of time. Calming is the appearance of a thought structured onto a sleek black framed imitation fun box.
Frustrated by ignorance for ignorance.
Imitated by those who grovel at my feet in an endless portrayal of their inferior superiority. Understanding a relation to the ones I see in myself- through eyes of a petty intelligence that is beautiful for it's relentless progression.
Timely spoken in an untimely situation of thoughts misconstrued leads to a deeper resentment of communication of the mind and neurons struggling for a less neurotic process.
Taken from the part of mind that has self medicated and thrown back into a diseased world order. Engulfed in a sensual temptation to eat of the uneatable fruit surrounding an impressionable ignorant babe of self discovery.
Timid to speak of that which is spoken only to oneself. Unsure of how to present a pristine balance of what was is and will be. Caught in a trap glorified as present like the forgotten innocence of Christmas time hopefulness. Hugged by the mistletoe that spoke to me with a sensitive smell of comfort and faith.
Weary at the inevitable moment knocking away at the door forcing me to end and begin again. Haunted by the non existent time in which the disease has once again made it's mark. Delighted in the thought of a cool breeze eternally drying my tears amongst a bed of ice and ash sprinkles.
Ending for what is known as simply how to be for the betterment of a descriptive disaster with so much character. With so much influence that stood on shoulders of the grandfather of influential family members in which I reside as merely an embryonic creator.
Enjoy what can be enjoyed for the moment it can be enjoyed. Space-time will eternally carry the frequencies of what has been what is and what is to come whenever it is that it will come.
Patience is a delightful law in which to abide a restless pattern of contempt for ones action.