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Guilty

I sometimes forget which life is a dream and how things could be as they seem.
I dream to wish I'm awake and I awake to wish I'm dreaming.
How is a dream a dream, and of which dream do I speak?
I dream as I'm awake and I awake to dream.
Nothing in my dream is as I need it to be.
The memories are lost amongst reality.
Nothing is as real as I dream it to be.
Everything is greater than me.
I live a distorted reality.

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I have never really understood will power. I understand boredom. I think it's a waste of time to think about how boring your imagination is. You're so dull, you can't entertain yourself, but I get it. I've had will power, and I like to think that once you've experienced something, it increases your knowledge of said something. But when I weigh out the benefits of telling yourself what you want, and then sticking to it, it falls short on the scale next to living in the moment. Making crazy, off the wall, out of the blue, stupid decisions is part of being human, it's part of the human experience. I can't understand why people don't want to make bad decisions. It was one of "those days." The kind of emotional girl roller coaster days you'd see in a rom com where the girl is taking turns comforting herself in greasy french fries and Tom Hanks' love stories with whatever her name is with the orgasms, except there were drugs, and it wa...
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